Wednesday, December 27, 2006

You can never come home

With each visit to Manila I am reminded that I don't live here anymore.

There are boxes in my room now, where there used to be small heaps of clothing, mountains of books, towers of DVDs. My car is as clean as a whistle. No four day old coffee cups, shopping bags and gas receipts carpetting the floor.

Everyday I need to do "something". Renew my license, see the derma, then the dentist, go to the spa. I like how positive emotions about Manila are reinforced by having dinner with friends and family every night, but everything seems so artificial. Like those gatherings were planned weeks before (and actually, they were).

I am annoyed at everyday, natural occurences (ie ants attacking unattended candy, cat poo stinking up the garden). I am troubled by the poverty, repelled by the filth, bothered by the lack of infrastructure.

I've been away 4 months. Imagine how removed I will feel in 4 years.

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